Kellyanne Conway isn't exactly the most popular person at the moment. So when she recently stated her view of feminism as anti-male and pro-abortion, many quickly dismissed her again, and pointed out the dictionary definition of feminism as a movement upholding gender equality as the 'correct answer'. Once again, feminists get to believe that we are the good people who believe in equality, and only someone like Conway can be so misguided about our great purpose.
But, let's face the reality. Conway's view is by no means uncommon. The idea that feminism is boys vs girls is everywhere, even expressed by some celebrities. And just recently, some feminists have said that pro-lifers don't belong in the movement. So maybe this is a case of, if there's such a widespread belief, there has to be some truth to it.
Real feminism is of course about gender equality, and nothing else. It is certainly not anti-male, and does not have to be uniformly pro-abortion. But if people out there are getting another message, it's not their fault, but ours. We, the feminist movement, haven't been clear about what we stand for. We haven't made the tent wide enough to be inclusive of everyone who believes in gender equality, including people of different political and religious belief, and including men.
If we don't change, the view out there won't. You can't just use a dictionary definition to shut people up.